The Roster · South Kensington · SW7
Thea behind the sliding door at Umu
Caramel hair, green eyes and a cyclist's appetite for a long kaiseki.
Away until 22 September 2026In the hills this week; back to W1 evenings after
- Age
- 29
- Height
- 165 cm · 5 ft 5 in
- Hair
- long caramel blonde
- Eyes
- green
- Figure
- curvy
- Languages
- English
- Home district
- South Kensington · SW7
The full set
Four photographs, all of Thea herself: glamour and lifestyle shots, some with the face softened, none with nudity. Tap any frame for the larger print. How we photograph.
Thea, in brief
Down to earth is not a phrase the society pages use often after dark, which is exactly why evenings with Thea are remembered. Curvy and 165 cm, with caramel blonde hair that falls long and green eyes that crinkle at the corners, she keeps her look sunlit and natural: a simple dress in a warm colour, very little makeup, gold hoops, ankle boots most of the year.
Cheerful and warm, she puts people at ease immediately, and her laugh carries across a restaurant without ever being too loud. Late twenties. English, spoken with a natural openness. Japanese food is the great passion, from ramen to kaiseki, and she has eaten her way along most of the best counters in London. Hiking takes her to the hills whenever possible, the Lake District and Snowdonia above all, and cycling is how she crosses the city, rain or shine. Friends say she is the only person who comes back from a wet weekend in Wales happier than she left.
Her favourite table in Mayfair is at Umu on Bruton Place, a refined Kyoto-style restaurant behind a sliding door, where the kaiseki menu unfolds in many small and beautiful courses. She loves the ritual and the precision, and she explains each dish with real enthusiasm and no showing off. Berkeley Square is a minute away for a slow walk afterwards, and she will want one.
Thea lives in South Kensington and is on a hiking week until the 22nd. Mayfair is her favourite corner of W1; Cressida will take requests for her return through booking.
The hours, priced
The Society's figures apply to Thea as to everyone on the roster: stated in pounds, given to her yourself at the door, and with her journey inside Zones 1 and 2 already folded in.
| Hour | Length | Fee | Suits | Enquire |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 19:00 | One hourThe introduction | £600 | Long enough for a glass at the bar and a proper conversation, and a gentle way to begin. | Enquire |
| 23:00 | Ninety minutesThe nightcap | £900 | The hour with room left over for a second glass and an unhurried goodbye. | Enquire |
| 21:00 | Two hoursThe long drink | £1,100 | An evening in, or an opening two streets away, without anyone glancing at a watch. | Enquire |
| 22:00 | Three hoursThe second act | £1,500 | Supper somewhere small, then the remainder of the evening at a pace you set together. | Enquire |
| 20:00 | Four hoursThe table for two | £1,800 | Shaped around a single good table, from the first course to the last car home. | Enquire |
| 00:00 | Ten hoursUntil morning | £3,000 | From the first glass of the evening to breakfast in the suite. Ask a day ahead where you can. | Enquire |
| Fri | Two nights or moreThe weekend away | from £6,000 | In London or further afield, with one figure for the whole stay once the dates are fixed. | Enquire |
Past Zone 2, airports and changes of plan: Rates
Thea, after dark
Thea's evenings are warm and unforced. She meets you at seven, cheeks still pink from cycling across the park, and apologises for nothing because she is exactly on time. Dinner is taken at a counter, Japanese of course, where the chef greets her by name and she orders the seasonal menu without a pause. She talks about a ridge walk in Snowdonia last month, a ramen shop in Kyoto she still dreams about, the ride along the Thames that makes London look like another city. She is genuinely curious about your life and asks without prying. Dessert, she insists, is always the matcha. After dinner comes a turn around the square, then a drink somewhere cosy. You leave in better spirits than you arrived in.
Thea answers
Nothing. Let the chef decide. The whole point is trust: order nothing, eat everything, and thank him properly.
Tryfan, in Snowdonia. It is a scramble rather than a walk, and the view from the top is worth every scraped knee.
More than people think. The canal towpaths at dawn are almost empty and very beautiful, and the bakeries along the way open early.
Remarks in the book
The page is still blankNo remarks have been entered for Thea yet. When a guest writes something worth keeping, and she agrees, it appears here beneath the guest's first name, with the month set beside it. Nothing on this page is ever composed by the Society.
Entered only after Cressida has read them · signed with a first name and the month only · withdrawn whenever Thea asks
A line for Thea
Thea is already named. Fill in the brackets, send it, and Cressida answers every line in a single reply.
Good evening Cressida. May I book Thea for [length] on [date], from [time]? I shall be at [hotel name], and will pass on the room number once you confirm.
Also based in South Kensington
Danielle
Milena
Tiffany
Tina
From After Dark Notes
- 5 min readGame at the grand tables: the British calendar from the Twelfth to winter venisonGrouse on the Twelfth, partridge in September, pheasant and woodcock by October, venison as the nights draw in. How to dine the British game calendar in W1, and with whom.
- 5 min readSix at midnight: the suite as an after-dinner salon, with a guest who hosts beside youWhen the restaurant stacks its chairs and nobody wants the night to end, the suite becomes the salon. Warning the hotel, ordering ahead, glassware, music and a companion who co-hosts.
Send word about Thea
Mention Thea by name and the evening you have in mind. If she is spoken for, Cressida will say so plainly and suggest someone close in spirit.